i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
You can't special order awesome
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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