dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Randomize