He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
