Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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