I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
She needs sedatives and a leash
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
