That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
