There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize