Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Randomize
