No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize