summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize