But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize