my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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