you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
