i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
