I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Little spoons don't ask big questions
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
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