I hate all girls vehemently.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize