I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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