Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
