is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I just found puke in my bra..
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
