Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
