He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
