awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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