Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
