His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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