I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize