I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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