you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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