please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
