I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
