If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Randomize
