BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
