i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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