I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i don't like sucking hair
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
