does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
