she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
