At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
