living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
