Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
