Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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