the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
