Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
he's gonorrhea incarnate
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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