so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
