WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
