The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
They have beer where we have blood.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
