were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
