WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
i believe in u and ur pee
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
