sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
