that's an acceptable place to lick
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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