I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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