Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
