Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize
